Thursday, February 10, 2011


I read blogs and threads all of the time. I used to read them when D and I were waiting to find out if we were pregnant and even the due date boards after we knew Aven was coming. It was nice to read what other women were thinking or if they were experiencing the same sort of things I was. I don't visit those blogs anymore. Instead the blogs and threads I read are on pregnancy loss and miscarriage. I am still amazed even after 15 weeks have passed that this is my world now. I remember being naive and pregnant in a happy state of bliss. It never crossed my mind that my life would turn from ordinary to something that words can't describe. I read somewhere that women that lose thier husbands are called widows and that children that lose their parents are called orphans but there is no word for parents that lose their child because that is how awful it is that no one can seem to come up with a word to call it. As I was reading one of my threads today I came across this poem that someone posted. I don't know who wrote it but I admire them for writing it.

My Mom's a Liar

Ask my mom how she is…

My Mom, she tells a lot of lies,
She never did before.
But from now until she dies,
She'll tell a whole lot more.

Ask my Mom how she is
And because she can't explain,
She will tell a little lie
Because she can't describe the pain.

Ask my Mom how she is,
She'll say "I'm alright."
If that's the truth, then tell me,
why does she cry each night ?

Ask my Mom how she is,
She seems to cope so well.
She didn't have a choice you see,
Nor the strength to yell.

Ask my Mom how she is,
"I'm fine, I'm well, I'm coping."
For God's sake Mom, just tell the truth,
Just say your heart is broken.

She'll love me all her life,
I loved her all of mine.
But if you ask her how she is,
She'll lie and say she's fine.

I am Here in Heaven.
I cannot hug her from here.
If she lies to you don't listen,
Hug her and hold her near.

On the day we meet again,
We'll smile and I'll be bold.
I'll say, "You're lucky to get in here, Mom,
With all the lies you told!"

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